Wednesday, October 7, 2009

I've sat down with the intent to write many times over the past week, but just haven't been able to muster up the emotional energy to get the words out. I feel like I have nothing positive to say, to be honest. I have no idea why God's brought us here...wandering around in the wilderness. I hate how quiet our house is, how monotonous our lives seem, how empty our hearts feel. I just don't get it.

Maybe someday this time in our lives will make some sense, but that time feels far, far away...and even if it does make sense and there finally appears to be some purpose to this, it's very little comfort right now. I'm just so frustrated.

This is going to sound funny, but sometimes I catch myself wondering whether or not God really understands what's going on in our lives. I feel deserted and alone. I know that He's here and that His love never changes, but getting those concepts from my head to my heart is challenging.

I guess for now I'll just hang on to what God has promised - that He is God...He gets it when I don't...His plans for me are good...nothing can separate me from the love of Christ...He is present in my pain...I am not alone.

"I cry out with no reply
And I can't feel you by my side
But I'll hold tight to what I know:
You're here, and I'm never alone."
- Barlowgirl (Never Alone)

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose...Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?...No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Romans 8:28,35,37-39

"I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for Me?"
Jeremiah 32:27

"Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze...Do not be afraid, for I am with you."
Isaiah 43:1-2, 5

"Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall."
Psalm 55:22

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."
2 Corinthians 12:9

Lord, may Your promises penetrate my mind and heart today. Amen.


  1. Oh, Court...praying for you extra today!

  2. Psalms 28 is amazing.... check it out...
    Psalm 28

    Of David.

    1 To you I call, O LORD my Rock;
    do not turn a deaf ear to me.
    For if you remain silent,
    I will be like those who have gone down to the pit.
    2 Hear my cry for mercy
    as I call to you for help,
    as I lift up my hands
    toward your Most Holy Place.

    3 Do not drag me away with the wicked,
    with those who do evil,
    who speak cordially with their neighbors
    but harbor malice in their hearts.

    4 Repay them for their deeds
    and for their evil work;
    repay them for what their hands have done
    and bring back upon them what they deserve.

    5 Since they show no regard for the works of the LORD
    and what his hands have done,
    he will tear them down
    and never build them up again.

    6 Praise be to the LORD,
    for he has heard my cry for mercy.

    7 The LORD is my strength and my shield;
    my heart trusts in him, and I am helped.
    My heart leaps for joy
    and I will give thanks to him in song.

    8 The LORD is the strength of his people,
    a fortress of salvation for his anointed one.

    9 Save your people and bless your inheritance;
    be their shepherd and carry them forever.

  3. Courtney- thanks again for your honesty; it is a blessing to me. Praying that God meets you where you need him today.

    Hugs, Kelli