There have been numerous times in the past couple of weeks when the loss of my son has been so "punch-you-in-the-gut" that it has felt like I said goodbye and kissed Zachary's face one last time just yesterday. There hasn't been any real reason or rhyme to it. No triggers I can identify or patterns in my emotions. I've just missed him. And the sorrow has swept over me in waves.
I listened to a sermon this evening by Bill Hybels, who pastors at Willow Creek Church in Illinois, titled "Grieving with Hope." It was based on 1Thessalonians 4:13: "For we grieve not as those who have no hope."
It was an excellent reminder that, not only did God guarantee that we would walk through horrific circumstances in our lives, but that grief takes time, and in order to be made whole again, we have to give it time. So often I wish I could just "get over it" and stop feeling sad, but that's not how this works.
I would strongly encourage you to listen to this message if you've recently experienced a loss or know someone who has and want to be a great support to them. You can go to willowcreek.org, click on "Watch Messages" on the right-hand side, and find "Grieving with Hope" in the sermons from May 2010. (Sorry, it won't let me link it on here...)